Just a lowly cashier complaining about the unknowing irritation you cause by everyday purchasing transactions.

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

My Bleeding Eardrum and Re-Shop Lessons

Yesterday's Quit-O-Meter: 9.5 (and I was actively playing out quitting scenarios in my head). 

I once read a sentence in a message board after searching for the words 'I hate working at Walmart' that made a great deal of sense to me. "You know your job is shitty when you contemplate suicide everyday you're there but are mentally healthy as soon as you leave."  I am clearly not alone in my cashiering hatred, thankfully.  

It's been difficult to want to write this blog for the last day or two.  I've been feeling out of sorts, even bordering on depressed when my mind even wanders to thoughts relating to work.  I feel so stuck in a rut career-wise and I have no idea what to do.   A lot of people say that college is the hard part.  Bullshit.  College was the easy part once you pick a major.   Because once you get out into the real world, you really have to decide your place in it and there isn't a degree checklist to help you find your way.  Sometimes I feel like the time I spent in college and the debt I've accrued haven't been worth it.  Although ultimately I'm glad I possess a degree because it's the one thing that demonstrates that I'm a cut above the rest of the cashiers.  And I guess that sounds mean, but then again... it's not my fault they've decided to settle for a job as monotonous, shitty, and hugely unrewarding as being a cashier. 

Last night I worked 5-10 and for the most part I just gave people breaks (which I don't mind, it serves to break up my shift a little).    I had to give Cold Shoulder Girl a break and for some reason she couldn't sign off of her register so I was going to have to use her numbers.

"Just don't screw me up," she said as she gathered her things.
"Pssh, screw you up?  I'll probably help you out," I scoffed (referencing her Items Per Hour number).
"Oh, I didn't mean it like that... I was just kidding," she tried to backtrack.  Oh yeah?  Blow it out your ass. 

Oh and I learned what my IPH was to make me the fastest cashier: averaging 811 items per hour.  Yay.  The Zone Manager (the overly excited one from here) caught me by the time clock yesterday and was praising me for the dull and pointless achievement and advised me to keep up the good work.  Then she made me read some stupid document about future management positions.  I don't know if all the cashiers had to read that or if it means something. *shivers*  The thought of being a Walmart manager makes me want to run for the nearest exit. 

If it's not the customers that are going to ultimately drive me to just walk away from my register, it's going to be the customer's annoying offspring.  I had a customer with a young boy who randomly out of no where emitted such an earsplitting scream that my right ear still doesn't feel right.  I swear that I will probably never hear that pitch again in my life, the ear cells are officially and brutally murdered.  I have never wanted to slap a child more in my life and I wish the parent had done it.  But there is never ever a time during my entire shift that there isn't one child crying.  There is an endless screaming, crying, temper-tantrum-throwing child.  I could choose to listen at ANY TIME and there is one in one of the checkout lines.  It's no wonder I feel miserable when the sound of crying is the soundtrack to my shift.   

I've been also doing a ton of re-shop lately which I have come to really like as opposed to being stuck on a register.  I take my little cart back to whatever section and look for where things go.  I can stand around and "pretend" to look for an item when I'm really just staring off into space.  I even sometimes take the re-shopping as an opportunity to shop for items myself.  I get to see all of the new items and make a mental checklist of what I want to get either when I get off work or in the future.  So when we do re-shop later in the day, like 10 pm or so, there aren't many customers in the store and they leave me alone for the most part.  I used to not know where a lot of things are but as a result of all the re-shop, I now know a lot more.  Here's some observations I've made while doing re-shop:

1.)  Some of the same items need to be re-shopped everyday.  I don't know how many times I've had to put back this one Spongebob pillow but I put it back nearly every day!
2.)  I go down a clear aisle and happily celebrate that it is empty and begin putting items away.  It is then that a huge horde of people descend on the aisle as if they are invading and ready for battle.  
3.)  No one ever works in Hardware and Sporting Goods.  They are seriously ALWAYS MIA and it pisses me off because then a customer comes and bugs me. 
4.)  The most peaceful place in the store during re-shop time is Lawn & Garden.  I usually take my time and enjoy the quiet. 
5.)  If you're wearing a navy shirt, I instantly think you work there until I go to look for khakis and a name tag.  I accidentally asked a customer if we had an item another customer was looking for.  Embarrassing, yes.  But I quickly looked around and pretended I was asking myself out loud.  I bet I looked like an idiot.
6.)  A lot of male associates try to flirt with me and say things like, "Oh... you're new here?" *wink wink* BLEH. 
7.)  Customers couldn't find their asses if it wasn't attached. 
8.)  I find A LOT of empty drink containers and food wrappers.  Disgusting. 

I'm sure there will be more to come. 

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