Just a lowly cashier complaining about the unknowing irritation you cause by everyday purchasing transactions.

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

I'm The #1 Cashier...

Yesterday's Quit-O-Meter reading: 6 (trust me, it's never going below a six.)

Apparently there's a speed contest for cashiers that I wasn't aware of and upon arriving to work yesterday I was told that I was number one in IPH (items per hour) out of all the cashiers in the store.  Everyone was really excited about this for some reason.  I think it's kinda silly but it's also kinda sad that I've only been there for almost three months and I've beaten everyone that's worked there longer than me.  I even had an associate come up to me and shake my hand for beating her for the top position that she's held seven years running.  I wasn't aware that there was such a contest, I just do what I always do and if there's no compensation (whether it's an extra break or even a slight monetary compensation), who cares? 

In the past I was told by another associate that speed doesn't matter (and every cashier before they sign off for any reason always checks their speed... I don't).  So, clearly it does matter if there's some sort of list to be on top of, right?  Maybe he was trying to clear out the competition? 

When you have no customers you're supposed to sign off so your IPH doesn't go down and I usually forget to do that so I wonder if it could have been higher had I remembered?

So... I'm the number one cashier.  Somehow, that's really sad to say.  The thing that I'm really good at is passing items over a scanner and putting them into bags.  That's a confidence builder, right there. 

There was a customer yesterday who I wanted to throat chop (just lean over the counter and ninja chop to get her away from me).  She stood with her face two inches from the register read-out (I'm not exaggerating at all, TWO INCHES!) and she would look at the item I was scanning, then the price, look at the item I was scanning, and then back to the price.  Her head bobbed up and down and up and down for nearly SIXTY items.  It was driving me insane because I could see it out of my peripheral vision and her head was just bobbing annoyingly.   She must've had bad vision but she wasn't wearing glasses at all.  If her vision is that bad, holy shit, how does she even tie her damn shoes or walk behind a cart?!

If you come up to the register with produce, do not proceed to tell me what it is.  If I am holding it up to my nose it is because I cannot read the small little number code on the sticker.  I am not holding an orange up to my face because I can't figure out what it is.  Yes, I know what a roma tomato, (tomatillo, avocado, etc.) is.  Then the other day I had a lady getting mad at me for "weighing" the red pepper and green pepper twice... even though those are priced individually.  Customers insult my intelligence on a daily basis. 

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