As a customer, you don't want to think about the things you're buying that are potentially embarrassing and exposing. I do the same thing... I had to buy a bra at Walmart yesterday and it was difficult deciding which cashier (that I see on a daily basis) that I would allow to touch this undergarment. Either a lot of people were buying condoms yesterday and I just happened to come across them, but it seemed like everyone buying Trojans were headed to my line.
When you are just buying the items singularly, it is more awkward than when you are buying the KY or even a douche with the rest of your groceries. If you buy it alone, I know why you came here and it's just weird. I try to throw those Trojans in the bag as quickly as I can because I don't want to touch the box too long. Mentally, I grab the box of condoms like I'd be grabbing a dead spider and throw it in the bag with an "Eww!" like a sissy girl. I know that's juvenile but if you saw some of the cretins that I see buying condoms, you'd understand. I almost want to thank them for choosing not to procreate with each other because we already have enough freaky babies coming into the world. (Side note: is it me or are most babies nowadays really ugly and scary-looking? I have hardly seen one cute baby in the last year, the gene pool must be getting dry.)
Yesterday the first condom buyers came through my line. The guy had the body of a fourteen year old and the face or someone who has most likely spent most of his time playing World of Warcraft. The lady had the body of a garden gnome: stubby, short, and thick. Now I'm not saying weird people can't have sex, but I am upset that I was now kind of involved in it. Because of me, they can now do it... bleh.
Another awkward moment came last week when two coworkers came through my line who I now know are a couple. It's weird to see someone you've passed on a daily basis buying condoms from you. Under normal circumstances you really don't want to think about them doing anything along those lines... and now I know that after you left work, you were going to do it. Too much information, thanks for sharing. Why didn't you go to one of the old ladies who have eyesight so bad they can't even see what the item is unless they put it up to their glasses?
If you're just buying condoms, please don't be a couple that is all over each other. It totally weirds me out. I don't want to see any pre-game action. He then placed the small pack of Trojans on the counter and paid the $3.13 with a GIFT CARD! This nearly made me laugh. I kept thinking... "I wonder who the gift card was from. Would his Grandma or boss or parent ever think he'd buy such a thing with their gift?"
Then there was a memorable gentleman a couple weeks ago who bought cookies and condoms. That's it. And not even GOOD cookies, the cheaper-than-Walmart generic cookies. But this scenario begs the question, "What is a good thing to buy WITH condoms?" Consequently, because of what you use condoms for... anything bought in culmination could be potentially hilarious. Frozen veggies? Milk? Peanut butter? A DVD? Wooden spoon? They all sound weird.
One man thought it would be clever to hide his bottle of KY under his group of frozen dinners. Sorry sir, that didn't work. Everyone saw it!
Before working at Walmart, I had no idea how many women bought douches. I thought that it was rather well known that those aren't good for you. But, about 4 out of 10 of my female customers every day buy a douche. I also try to get that baby in the bag quickly because... eww. Women also buy such a large variety of hygiene products. By that I mean, one woman will buy up to three or four different pads, tampons or liners. Seriously, how many do you go through!? Are you buying for a Sorority house here!?
I don't like touching your underwear either. The male underwear isn't so bad because those are in bags, wrapped up and easily scannable. It's the women's underwear that is annoying. They're usually hanging on a little flimsy hangar (that gets caught on everything!) and I have to bring your undies/bras across the same scanner that I scanned a bag of juicy chicken parts. Yuck, huh? It's just strange to touch other people's underwear. I know they haven't worn them yet but... they're going to. Maybe right when they get home.
Same thing with bras. If they are especially huge bras, I will say "Daaaaamn" to myself as I try to stuff the huge cups into the bag. I will also look at the size of your clothes and mentally assess whether or not they are for you, someone else and if such a size would really fit you or if it's a size I will wear I will think to myself, "Do [I] really look like that?!"